The Big Birthday Batch
by bootifulbabe
Summary: My first Fic! so be nice plz...i dont want any critism! Hermione has been Invited to Harry's 22nd Surprize Birthday...Crazy pairings, alot of Smut and achohol use... My Apoligiez for any Puncuation and spelling mistakes!...PLZ R n R!
1. The Invitation

The Big Birthday Batch

Chapter One: The Invitation

Hermione had stunningly changed over the last 5 years, for once she felt like a real woman with her femine curves here and there, her hair was no longer the bushy mop but it was slick, smooth and blonde, her eyes twinkled as a smile would perk up only the guys could die for. Her life was great as she got a successful job working as one of the reporters for the Daily Prophet; she had the most perfect, charming boyfriend who was famous for his Quidditch abilities

"HERMIONE…get back to work" Ginny growled from the doorway, interrupting Hermione's thoughts

Hermione jumped slightly as she ignored Ginny's anxious face and returned to jotting her notes down, as she heard Ginny let out a snarl she stalked off, her nose in the air

"Stupid Bitch" Hermione whispered under her breath as she struggled to finish her article on the suspicious killings that had being happening around the Ministry of Magic, Hermione was about to give up when there was a rather loud knock on her door

"Come in unless your that stupid son of a Bitch Ginny I don't want to hear you stupid remarks" Hermione growled not looking behind her as she was filing her work

"I didn't know you felt that way towards my sister like that" a familiar voice had echoed through out the walls of her office, Hermione turned to see Ron, she had almost screamed as she leapt from her seat and pulling him into a almost like bear hug

"arrgh Harry-was-right about-you" Ron choked as he pulled Hermione off flashing her his devilish smile, Hermione giggled as she pulled a chair out for him and he kindly took the offer as he pecked her lightly on the cheek. Hermione not long after sat down as she could feel tears come into her eyes.

She couldn't believe that Ron, one of her best friends from school was sitting right before her very eyes, it had been 4 years since they had lost all contact as she had a boyfriend to accompanied and Harry and Ron shipped off to America to participate the Quidditch Tour, of course she had seen them across the Television and seen pictures of them but this was different

"Wow Hermione aren't you looking…hot" Ron said encouraging as he eyed her with a twinkle in his beautiful blue eyes. Hermione laughed as her cheeks turned into a crisom colour "You don't look to bad yourself Ronald" Hermione replied as she looked from his golden crisp, on what it used to be red, Blond hair to his ocean blue eyes to his toned stomach, he was perfect, how could he be single?

"So you still single from the last time I have seen you?" Hermione asked, with anticipation

"nope Im proud to say"

"your not" Hermione replied, feeling her greatest happiness towards him

"I met this beautiful Model in America Her names Matika, When she gets a little bit more money she coming over here to live and we're getting a small cottage on the outskirts of Europe...and hopefully i can pop the question to her" Ron Triumphly said

"oh that's great" Hermione said as she pulled him into a loving hug, feeling his body heat radiant that made her warm and fuzzy inside, Ron's hugs were more rough and over and done with, but- Harry's on the other hand were a lot more softer and they lasted forever.

How's Harry is he alright?" Hermione had asked once they pulled away, Ron nodded as he smiled

"yes he's more then ok he's getting married!" Ron announced as his frowned turned upside down and he was showing of his pearly white teeth

Hermione felt her heart ache for some odd reason as her smile faded, she didn't wanted this to happen…well at least not yet

"MARRIED" Hermione squealed and Ron looked at her with concern

"yes Hermy I just said that" Ron paused as he patted her arm affectionally " are you ok Herms"

Even though Hermione hated the pet names "Hermy" and "Herms" but- she didn't care less of what Ron had just called her, what she really cared was Famous Harry Potter was getting married- Hermione had the biggest crush on him since grades 3 and 4 and as a result he ignored her completely and shut her off out of his life

Hermione felt as though she was going to barf, as nothing came out of her mouth but the airy silence and her breathing turned into heaving

"Hermione do you want something to drink" Ron said away pouring her a small glass of water and kindly handing he the glass with the content of water inside, she drank it and handed the empty glass to Ron

"thanks I erm had something in my throat" Hermione lied as she fixed her skirt up and smiled sweetly at Ron

"wow Our Harry's growing up isn't he?" Hermione said, hiding a tear, from this point she could tell she was more in love with him. With his jet black hair and his shocking Green eyes, from time to time Hermione would hear rumors through out the school that he's the best shag a girl could possibly have.

"oh ok, there's something I Want to ask you" Ron exclaimed

"Ok, what is it?"

"Harry's celebrating his 22nd birthday and it's a surprise party, are you interested attending it?" Ron asked, Hermione's smile perked up and nodded

"I would be delighted"

"oh great I must run, I'll call you tonight and give you more details ok" Ron said reassuringly

Hermione gave him both her Mobile and Home number and as he was about to head out Hermione called out his name

"yes Herms?" Ron said

Hermione cleared her throat "who's the lucky woman" Hermione replied, her eyes twinkled

"Pansy Parkinson…believe it or not" Ron said as he was now checking his watch as he sighed looking a little red

"Sorry Hermy I really got to go" and he bolted off with out another word.

PANSY PARKISON was all was running through out her head, she couldn't believe Harry, after all the name calling and calling her a pug, He WAS getting married to her, she broke down in tears, it was all Harry's fault for ruin her life forever….TBC

Hey plz review! Its my first fic so be nice! i apoligies for thePuncuation and Spelling


	2. Believing the Unbelievable

Chapter Two: Believing the Unbelievable

After what had seem an hour or two Hermione was now on her lunch break, finishing the last of her filing she had met up with one of her good friends, Luna who looked a bit to happy that she was also invited to Harry Potters big 22, Luna had done a lot of growing up over the last 3 years as she looked like a young mature young woman, with her porcelain skin and her pale blue eyes and her long silky blond hair, she was stunningly pretty

"did you think you gals were going to have your lunch with out me did you" a snarky voice had rung out through out Hermione's ears, Hermione knowing that it was going to be that some of the bitch Ginny so Hermione turned and smiled through gritted teeth as Luna let out a small sigh before giving Ginny a big welcome hug

"Hello Luna, long time no see…Love the dress on you" Ginny said, as she pulled away from Luna and flung her arms around Hermione, Hermione felt as though she was going to be sick on Ginny

"hello my sweet Hermione, Your skirt looks flattering…where you get it?" Ginny replied as the three girls headed towards the nearest coffee shop

"a shop obviously" Hermione said smirking at the little bitch as she glared at Hermione her eyes darting at Hermione

"lets eat shall we" Luna jumped into conclusion, hooking her arm around Hermione as she dragged her into the shop, Ginny following closely behind them

As they were seated and ordered a coffee and a scone each they then started talking about whatever came into mind. Ten minutes later their Coffees and Scones arrived and they started eating them away

"Did you hear about Harry" Luna replied, her voice quiver as she was in dream zone again, she was the same Luna after all

"yeah, I knew he was going to marry…but not with pug face" Ginny scowled, her voice was also quivering with jealously

"Yea" was all Hermione could think of as she was in dream zone herself

She didn't understand it though… She had the perfect life, she thought she was well and truly over him but when she had found out he was getting married she just shattered

Timothy, Hermione's Boyfriend…He was just like another Harry, but there was something missing that Harry's got and Timothy hasn't got it

"Hermione, are you there Hun" Luna said sweetly, Hermione trembled as she turned to see two sets of eyes glowering back at her

"yea, just resting my eyes"

"SHIT, we should be heading back now" Ginny grumbled pulling out her money and paying for her coffee and scone as the two other girls paid their equal amounts of shares and strided back to there work stationery's as they started to work once again till it was time to go home. Hermione was one of the last to leave as she was locking up her office and wrapping herself up in her suede coat when long arms coiled around her as her back came into contact with something warm and muscular

"TIMOTHY" Hermione squealed as she turned around to be face to face with her boyfriend, who she hadn't seen for a whole two day's now

"Hermy-babe…I just couldn't wait till you got home, I had to see you" Tim said, his every little word made her heart flutter as she flung onto him "come on sweetie lets get some Chinese and we'll watch a movie aye" Hermione whispered, she smiled with satisfactory as he shivered.

!Two hours Later!

Both Tim and Hermione were rather vanquish as they had last of their fried rice, they were about to settle down to watch the movie "Rasing Helene" when the phone rang

"I'll get it" Hermione said jumping from her position and grabbing the phone, knowing it was going to be Ron  
"hey Ron" Hermione said, she heard Ron in the background as he said his hello's

They talked about half an hour about the party details, and Ron finally knowing that young Hermione wasn't single any more

"oh so who's the lucky Chad" Ron said

"Timothy"

"No frikin way" was all Ron exclaimed, and the sound the phone falling out of place

"Yes way"

"me and Harry versed him once stage…of course we won" Ron said gleefully

Hermione let out a small giggle "I better go Ron"

"yea same here aye"

"drop by work tomorrow round 12 that's when my lunch breaks on"

"ok, bye Herms"

Bye Ronnikinz" and Hermione hung up, and raced into the lounge to find her boyfriend asleep on the couch

Hermione couldn't help but smile as she grabbed her wand "Accio Blanket" and a warm fuzzy blanket came zooming out of the guest room and into Hermione's open arms. Hermione wrapped her boyfriend in it along with his favourite pillow tucked under his head…she gave him a small kiss and went off down the hall and into their bed

DREAM  
Hermione was walking a long period of time as her dress skimmed behind her making her look like a goddess with her robes and dress whipping out behind her as her hair whipped her face like fiery whips, she then saw a shadowy looking shadow as she took of in a sprint, her feet felt sore as her feet padded along what felt like shards of cold grass

As she got closer she recognized the hair and the piercing green eyes from any where

"HARRY" Hermione screamed as she ran further towards him, he wouldn't move no look any where else but at Hermione  
Hermione stopped just in front of him and she slightly bent over to get her breath as she felt her sides singe with pain, she let out a gasp as she felt Harry's soft velvet hand come into contact with her face as he ran them along her cheek and downwards along her neck

"Hermione, your such a fine woman" and Harry lifted Hermione so that her lips came into contact with his supple ones, she hungrily started biting his lower lip making him gagged and Hermione's tongue slithered in devilishly surprising Harry as he pushed her till the back of the knees ran into the mysterious bed

"OH HARRY MAKE LOVE TO ME" Hermione whispered as they pulled away from the reluctant kiss.

"Plz" Hermione was now begging as she looked at Harry who was eyeing her

"Believe the Unbelievable my Hermione" Harry said as he toppled off her "but im getting married" Harry smirked and jumped off the bed, Hermione started whimpering as Pansy the pug nose some how come into picture, she was hideous and Harry was so perfect, a little to perfect for Pansy possible for her as well.

What Made Hermione feel like scream was when the both of them "beauty and the hideous beast" were making out like there was no tomorrow….Hermione had awoke from what was meant to be a fantasy which turned out to be a horrible ugly nightmare

"no Harry" Hermione cried softly into her hand as she curled up into a little ball…there was still hope in the world, but she didn't understand of how is Harry doing this…TBC

HEY my second attempt at the story! So plz review…no critisms PLZ! Thank you

CIAO


	3. Change of plans and Lets go Shopping

Previously On the last Chapter:

PANSY PARKISON was all was running through out her head, she couldn't believe Harry, after all the name calling and calling her a pug, He WAS getting married to her, she broke down in tears, it was all Harry's fault for ruin her life forever….TBC

Chapter Three: Change of plans and Lets go shopping

Hermione had a horrible sleep that very night as she had awoke from many horrible dreams Of Harry and Pug nose, Pansy. As her alarm went of at exactly 8 o clock she let out a low throat groan as she slumped out of bed and headed towards the shower.  
Hermione had quickly turned on the taps and adjusted the water temperature When Tim came in  
"good Morning Sunshine" his face lit up as he gave her a quick peck on the neck as he hugged her tenderly from behind, Hermione smiled weakly as she pulled away from her boyfriends grasp and pulled out a massive towel from the toiletry cupboard.  
"Shouldn't' you b at work" Tim said as he guzzled the water down that he had just brushed his teeth  
"I don't start till Ten on Saturdays Hun" Hermione replied as she pulled her top over her head

"That bra looks good on you" Tim said, smirking as he eyed her fully developed D cup breast, Hermione blushed as she slipped off her pants along with her cute boy legs, she was always a tease to her Boyfriend as she giggled at her him you was now struggling with arousal. She flicked of her bra and stood before Tim, naked

!ONE HOUR!

after what seemed to be an Hour (AN: I think we all know what happened there, in the shower) both Timothy and Hermione dried themselves, clothed each other and headed to their kitchen to grab a coffee and a piece of toast each.  
"mmm that hits the spot" Hermione mumbled as her eye lids still felt a little heavy, she checked her watch and almost fainted, She was late again and she didn't realize  
"holy FUCK" Hermione squealed, knowing the elderly couple next door would of heard the a abusive word, Hermione didn't really care…all she cared was that, her boss, Pavati is going to ring her neck (AN: I couldn't think of any one!)

"Bye" Hermione said, her cheeks were flushed as she piled everything into her handbag, Tim gave her a hug only to be torn apart as Hermione threw him off her, regretting every move

"we'll talk when I get home" Hermione yelled as she wrapped herself in her suede coat and walked out the door, as she started for work, her coat wipping behind her and her hair lashing beautifully from behind her, her cheeks were all ready frozen by the time she got around the block, she thought she was going to die from the freezing cold weather.

"Hey Herms quickly get in…you look freezing" the same voice had rung out through her ears from yesterday and last night on the phone, she looked to see Ron in a very flash black car with gold Flame interior designs on the doors  
"oh my god, thanks" Hermione gleefully said as she opened the passengers seat and seated her self in the sunken seat, Ron hit the gas as they drove off down the road.  
"You like?" Ron said, smiling at Hermione as they were at a set of lights, Hermione knew that she was probably going to get the sack because she was already half an hour late  
"Yea it looks amazing, when did you get it?" Hermione asked as the lights turned green and Ron took off down the street  
"About a month ago, I just had it done up last week"  
"cool" Hermione paused "how come you never seem to visit Ginny any more?" Hermione said curiously  
Ron let out a sigh as he turned into the old fashion building (AN: I know I just gave the lamest description of a building. But- bare with me)  
"because after the last few years ever since she married Malfoy" both Ron and Hermione let out a low piercing groan at the sound of his Farrell Name, it was enough to make her barf  
"well she's been very uptight, snobby and you could say bitchy" Ron exclaimed  
" Ron I would love to stay and chat but I got to go" Hermione said as she was about to open the door as Ron stopped her "wait I got to tell you something quick, I'm afraid I wont be able to make it in time for lunch Herms"  
"oh ok, what is it" Hermione said, her hands fidgeted in her pockets  
"about Harry's party do you think you could make it tomorrow?"  
"WHAT, I thought you meant next Sunday" Hermione squealed, her hands were by now shaking for some odd ball reason  
"we've changed it, most of the people can't make it next Sunday so we're doing it then Sunday"  
Hermione nodded as she gave him a small smile that she wasn't up for the idea but she smiled greatly and nodded  
"I'll inform Luna, Pavati and….Ginny I guess" Hermione said reassuringly, Ron let out a laugh  
"seriously Ron I got to go…I know where the party is and what I should be there" Hermione gave Ron a brief hug along with a peck on the cheek she jumped out of the car, not looking back as she bolted into the building, up the stairs. She quickly un locked her office door and walked inside to feel the cold air whip her face like a shard of ice just whacked her across the face.  
"Hermione your finally here" Luna's small voice quiver from somewhere behind Hermione  
"hey Lunz" (AN: my made up nick name) Hermione said turning the heater on and pulling off her jacket  
"you were lucky you've got a friend like me" Luna smiled as she took the seat next to a confused Hermione  
"how?"  
Luna smiled and giggled "well the boss was heading to your office and I made a distraction and she didn't go on in after all" Luna paused "she thought you were in there the whole time" Luna laughed as Hermione let out a small peakish laugh  
"thanks Luna" Hermione hugged Luna as she embraced Hermione back. As Luna had shared her fun for the day Hermione was now explaining that the party's tomorrow, Luna didn't take it to easy as she  
"omg" Luna squealed "what?" Hermione asked to be eyeing a panicky Luna  
"I have absolutely nothing to wear" Luna said, Hermione knew that it wasn't true she had stacks of clothes every where in her drawers.  
"I've got an idea" Hermione smiled as the word "Shopping" came into mind.  
"what is it?"  
"why don't me, you and Pavati go shopping this arvo" Hermione said, liking the sound of her idea  
"oh that sounds great, god Harry and Ron were right about you…you have wonderful ideas" Luna said "but wait" Luna paused "why are we taking Pav again?" Luna said dumbstruck  
"because she's invited as well and one of our friends…remember" Hermione said Reassuringly

"oh right…I knew that" Luna said and Hermione chuckled  
"ok I'll ask her and at 12 we'll meet just outside" Luna said pointing towards the door, Hermione agreed. They said their good byes and Luna left…Hermione couldn't wait to be finally spending some real money on herself and not on Tim, as she was thinking the perfect outfit…it wasn't to shabby nor sluttish but it was semi in between, she couldn't wait to see the look on Harry's face when he see's Her…TBC

Hey, please review!..Im not asking for much I just want some nice reviews that'll cheer me up  
its my birthday soon! YAY! jumps in joy!  
g2g now  
CIAO


	4. Shopping for the perfecto Outfit

Chapter four: Shopping for the perfecto Outfit  
  
After what seemed like years Hermione had finally finished her day's work, As a reward she was gonna go shopping. She packed up her personal items and did her make upfor a bit. She locked the office up feeling a little chilly she slipped on her favourite jacket and headed to the front door of the office block to find Pavati and Luna talking amongst themselves  
"hey" Hermione said as she joined in their little humble clan, each of the girls gave Hermione a quick hug and they settled off down the road.  
"Pav aren't you suppose to be patrolling the Office block, after all you are boss" Hermione said curiously  
"oh I left Lav on charge just untilI get back"  
"oh ok" Hermione replied, shoving her hands into her pockets  
as they arrived in a little resturant down the road from work they took their seats.  
"I think Harry's Making a terrible mistake" Luna exclaimed as they decided that they'll take a bite before they hit the shops for a little shopping  
"I agree" Pavati said as she was looking down onto the menu, like every body else  
"when did Ron say he was actually getting married?" Hermione asked as she slipped the menu away, knowing what she had a craving for  
"he didn't"  
"oh I still think he's making a mistake"  
"yea"  
5 minutes later their waitress came by "what would you like dears"  
"a Chicken Caesar salad with a berry smoothie on the side" Luna said with ease as if she knew it off by heart  
"Hmmmm that sounds yummy" Pavati paused " I'll have that too" Pavati smiled  
"Ill have-…A double cheese burger with Pumpkin juice on the side" Hermione said, her mouth watering for some greasy, fatty food. The Waitress rote down the orders and strode off  
"wow you eat like a pig" Pav joked and Hermione glared at her  
"I was only joking Hermy-babe" Pav said quickly raising her hands, indicating she was  
"Back to our discussion" Luna jumped in, as she was rummaging through her bag to find that she got a Message from her good Friend Keith  
"ohhhhhhh" Pav squealed like her girlie self "it's her boyfriend Monie" Pav squeaked causing a few people to look at what was squealing, as they saw it was Pav they shrugged it off and continued to chatter over their meals  
"shuddup" Luna murmured as she quickly replied to the message, te minutes later the waitress came back  
"here are your meals girls" the same waitress was back as she handed them each their meals  
"thanks" the girls chorused and they started chowing down their meals. Once they had finished, Hermione was full knowing that scrumptious burger had hit the spot  
"lets go tothat fancy dress shop there" Luna pointed out to, Hermione couldn't describe the place great in fact it looked more like a run down building with a few plants here and there  
"ummmm there is no way im shopping at a crappy place like that" Pav exclaimed crossing her arms in disbelieve  
Luna cackled "have you ever heard the moral "never judge a book by it's cover" have you?"  
"eeekk Hermy, she's talking smartly again Help me" Pav squealed as a smiled brim along her face and the three girls walked across the road, avoiding trucks and cars  
they opened the door and they were amazed. Luna was right for once, the place (inside) was beautiful and authentic with its red velvet draped along the walls of the tiny store  
"OMG" Pavati ran to the bargain pile and pulled out a beautiful black dress "this place is so beautiful, it has everything" Pav squeaked "sorry Lunz Hun, you were right" Pav smiled as she ran off into the depths of the shop, all Hermione called hear was Pav squealing and her clattering into the piles of shoes. Luna giggled as she headed to the more expensive tops and pants while Hermione went to one of the racks,  
"ugly"  
"eew"  
"way to long"  
"way to short"  
Hermione threw the clothes back onto the racks when she saw something catch her eye, she pulled off the rack to find a beautiful Chinese imprinted dress, it was in a deep ocean blue and it had the Chinese komodo dragon imprint on the side of it along with Chinese symbols on it  
"it's on special today" a soft voice had spoken and Hermione looked over her shoulder to find a beautiful Asian girl standing about a meter away from where Hermione was standing, she had long beautiful black hair flowing down her back like a cascade, her eyes were a lot darker then Hermione's like a deep coffee colour, she was wearing something a little out of the ordinary, with her long flowing deep purple dress and a plaid simple top  
"oh it is?" Hermione breaking the awkward silence between the both of them  
"yes it was 100 down to 50" The younger girl spoke  
"oh ok cool, could you hold it for me?" Hermione exclaimed and the younger girl nodded as she took hold of the dress and walked off down the other end of the shop, where the cashier was  
"hey have you found an out fit yet" Luna asked as she was now looking on the same rack as Hermione was  
"yea wait till you see it, it looks beautiful"  
"cant hardly wait" Luna said picking up a red dress that looked beautiful "wow" Luna paused "it's on special" Luna giggled and took off with the dress  
Hermione now only needed a good pair of heels and she was done as she went to the shoe section to find both Luna and Pav rummaging through the shoes  
Hermione had picked up a pair of white ones, they looked simple but perfect for her new outfit "wow it only took Hermione 5 minutes to find the perfect shoes for her and its taking me for ever" Pav whimpered  
"well hurry up" Hermione checked her watch "times a wasting" She explained and Pav almost buried her nose into the 100's of shoes  
"lets pay for our stuff Hermy" Luna said as she picked up a pair of black heels  
"ok" Hermione agreed. Each girl paid for their outfits and they were waiting what seemed for ever for Pav. At long last Pav had came out of the shop carrying up to 4 bags full of god knows what  
"PAV…you didn't by the whole shop now did you" Luna almost sounding like an old mother  
"I couldn't decideso I took most of the shoes" Pav said, sounding frustrated  
Both Hermione and Luna shared a laugh or too and headed back to work  
"I'll see you both I guess" Hermione said as she was about a street away from her house  
"yeah" Pav said, giving Hermione a small hug but only to be strangled by a ton of bags  
"yeah, I'll tell Ginny that the parties tomorrow" Luna scowled and Hermione laughed  
"bye" Hermione said and she took off down the street…TBC

**PLZ PLZ PLZ! Review:(…I want reviews…reviews make me happy**!


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